Friday, February 26, 2010

Talking Dirty

I have always loved me some raunchy language. I taught my kids to love raunchy language too. (No, no, I don't expect an award for that, so let's move on.)

When my kids were very young, we started to use the word "shamunga" for poop. Shamunga sounds so much dirtier than poop. When John was about 3, he would call me and say "Sheila needs her diapers changed! I smell shamunga!" When we saw dog poop on the sidewalk, it would throw is into fits of laughter as we pointed and cried out "Shamunga!".

Really disgusting things, like scrambled eggs dropped on the floor were "Hairy Muffins". Anything we could not identify but looked nasty was a "Hairy Muffin".

Although I do slip an occasional "shit", I actually prefer shamunga! It just sounds worse!

I never use the words "bitch" or "ho" because they are pedestrian and used by really unimaginative people. The word I kind of like is "c*nt". Yup, rhymes with runt. That word is one to describe a very important person who deserves a powerful word. You don't use that casually, but it's a good word, particularly if you call someone a "C*** of Death"! How great is that! It's a compliment as well as a power statement! (I never use that particular phrase in the supermarket though.)

My husband uses PMF to describe handsome men. The first word is Pretty. I'll let you guess at the other two words. I never fail to laugh when he says "I saw the PMF this morning."

I thought I was kind of a bad word queen until yesterday when I encountered the most powerful and amazing bad words ever! Terry over at "Oh For Pete's Sake" used this phrase in her post yesterday:
"Holy Fucking Monkey Balls". We have a new Queen. I bow to her!

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