I look somewhat normal, but don't be fooled.
I have just decided that I suffer from Obsessive/Compulsive Disorder. I guess I've had it for a long time, but never really recognized my symptoms.
I cannot buy enough shoes. I have to pick up anything that is out of place immediately. I refuse to get out of bed before 9:00 AM. As if that's not bad enough, I only appreciate white flowers. I love flowers, but if they are not white, they are somehow "wrong". And when something is "wrong", it makes me nervous.
I get on kicks where I read about one subject obsessively. But that's not all. I'll get so that I have to research anything about that subject that is mentioned in the book. This would be great if I was reading about something that would further my education in a practical way, but it never is. I'm so venal that I pursue knowledge about the harems of the Ottoman Empire. Now how often does that come up in conversation?
Recently, I've been reading about war. Not just one war, but everything I can find about all wars. Got a war in China in the 13th century? Great, let's read about it. How about the war on drugs? Fine! "The Art Of War"? Superb. The Civil War? Oh yeah. WEB Griffin has written a lot military fiction, maybe 50 books. I've read them all.
Before that, I was on a Polygamy kick. I think I read 27 books about polygamy in a row. Now, I know I have discussed having "Sister Wives" and I still think it's a good idea. I want young strong sister wives who like to cook, clean house, do laundry, iron, walk dogs, and clean up dog poop. I know the polygamous community is not usually all that great for some people, but I think it would work fine for me. I am not a jealous woman, but I am a lazy one. I am still hoping that Nicky and Ziva decide to join us one day. But I'm open to adding one or two more sister wives if they bring the right skill set to the table so to speak. If she could sew or do a little plumbing, it would be awesome.
With sister wives, I would have much more time to read and buy shoes and arrange white flowers.
Or maybe I should just get a pill for the OCD. That might be a lot cheaper.
I would like to be one of your sister wives! My OCD and your OCD would get along fabulously!
ReplyDeleteMeleah, we both like martini's! I mean, how could we go wrong?
ReplyDeleteexactly!
ReplyDeleteSister-wives aside I think I understand what you're talking about. While reading one book I'll follow up elsewhere on things that are mentioned in it. But it's just my natural sense of curiosity. The OCD part of me is forever straightening books and magazines on the coffee table, knick knacks and CDs on shelves, pictures on walls and so on, without ever really cleaning anything. So we may not have the cleanest house but it is the neatest.Hey wait a minute. Maybe I could use a sister-wife or two.
ReplyDeleteYou are too funny! Try a pill first...
ReplyDeleteWatch out for the "fine print" in the pills for OCD. I think you can safely check the OCD box. Reading your research compulsions made me tired.
ReplyDeleteYou look fabulous OCD and all!
ReplyDeleteI have moderate OCD myself but in different categories than you. I love to clean and love organization. Not particularly into shoes but part of that is that I have some foot problems and shoes in general hurt my feet. I love to cook but have to watch everything I eat so I don't have to go out and buy new clothes.
ReplyDeleteI get on kicks as well. I get more into books of the same genre as opposed to a singular subject. (for example: true crime)
As for sister wives...no way. I want husband all to myself. I am OK with having the sister wife do the grocery shopping but she needs not to ever expect any of husband's attention.
the medication may be cheaper but not as much fun. Imagine if you read all the books written about OCD? You'd probably learn how to buy more shoes and white flowers faster, more effeciantly. I don't know. I think a little OCD never hurt anyone. (You photograph well. Like a model.) Take care.
ReplyDeleteIt's not OCD...I prefer CDO, you know in alphabetical order...
ReplyDeleteHey Linda! No, embrace your inner OCD! The all sound entirely healthy obsessions, especially the shoes. And about inviting Nicky and Ziva to play; I've tried, believe me. They grumbled about me being a man, or some such nonsense. FML! Keep being you, m'dear! Indigo x
ReplyDeleteIf Alex is reading a newspaper, and he leaves it open on the coffee table when he runs in to grab more coffee, it's picked up and put away before he gets back. Books and magazines and such have to be orderly! Everybody knows that (or they should). They also need to be placed in alphabetical order as do the spices in the kitchen. I mean, that's just the start. Black shoes need to be placed next to black shoes. Brown shoes as well. Red shoes can be put toward the back because how often do we wear red. White shoes are not an option. Sister wives will have a few things to memorize but they certainly would free up a lot of our time.
ReplyDeleteI'm not really crazy about taking pills. But trying to herd the new kittens (I mean sister wives) might be a headache.
ReplyDeleteIf I actually read the fine print, Ann, I'd never pop a pill. I'd just live with my skin disorders, my impotence, and my bouts with stomach and female troubles. Writing those research compulsions exhausted me.
ReplyDeleteThank you Darling Nubian. It's all that red wine that keeps me going.
ReplyDeleteCheryl, the shoes I wear are usually painful, but it's not how I feel that matters. I adore them. I suffer for them. I love to cook and I love to eat more than I should. I never need an excuse to shop for new clothes.
ReplyDeleteSister wives sound fun to me. I don't care if my husband pays attention to her. She may not feel all that frisky after doing all her chores, but that's up to her.
I read a lot of mysteries and legal thrillers. Heck, I've read about 20 books a week on average. Thing is, now that I'm old, I don't remember what the hell I read before so I buy the same book twice or three times. I need to just go pull out something I read before and read it again. Good idea!
Thanks Myrna! I avoid reading anything medical because I get all the symptoms that anyone describes.
ReplyDeleteI think I might need to see a DOC.
ReplyDeleteHey Indigo! At last count, I had 17 pairs of black shoes. That seems a little low to me. But it could be because I rarely throw out shoes. Me and Nicky and Ziva and Meleah could have such fun (after they finish their chores, that is)!
ReplyDeleteGreat picture of you, Linda! Actually, I don't think you have OCD at all. All those little nuances are what make you, you; in other words, that's your personality. I have to admit to having the shoe issue, too, to some extent. I'm sorry I can't be a sister wife, though. I'm much too lazy.
ReplyDeleteThanks Jeanie! I would make a lousy sister wife too, Jeanie for exactly the same reason. That's why I would have to be the "First Wife" and rule the whole roost.
ReplyDeleteYou know I'm in on the sister wives thing. I can lend my bartending skills. I can be Sister Malisa Mixer...or something like that. I have OCD. You don't want to know. My quirks would drive you crazy!
ReplyDeleteYou make me laugh! I'm too lazy to be a sister wife... sorry. But if you have any left over, send them my way!
ReplyDelete"The Good, The Bad, The Worse" has been included in the Sites To See for this week. Be assured that I hope this helps to point many new visitors in your direction.
ReplyDeletehttp://asthecrackerheadcrumbles.blogspot.com/2013/02/sites-to-see.html
Fiona, we only want the young energetic ones. Think of all the Oscar poop and grooming you won't have to mess with. Think of the fur being cleaned up every day! You can spend your days photographing beautiful things and playing with your pup! I am way too lazy to be a sister wife too, but if I get some extras, I'll send them over.
ReplyDeleteMalisa, you know you're in. You have your own set of mad skills. You and I will direct the girls on what to do and keep them from fighting.
ReplyDeleteme, nah, i'm not OCD. well... except for Bonanza. I cannot stop watching Bonanza re-runs on youtube. Particularly Adam Cartwright. Rather obsessively. Dang, could it be I am a closet OCD'er!?
ReplyDeleteHopefully, I'll never suffer from OCD .. touch wood...touch wood...touch wood...touch wood..
ReplyDeleteMerri, I had dibs on Adam a long long time ago! You can have little Joe.
ReplyDeleteLove that! LOL!
ReplyDeleteOK, I'm easy!
ReplyDeleteAdam was always my favorite, but all of them were pretty darn cute. Even the father. Still, you were just a baby when I claimed Adam as mine.
ReplyDeleteI think there's a little OCD in all of us - especially those of us who blog. And if I ever need a war quote, I know who to contact. You must be an expert by now! I've recently been on a reading binge of medieval Europe - what life was like in towns, villages, castles, etc.
ReplyDeleteThe OCD pill might be cheaper, but it's also a lot less fun. Go for the sister-wives, but I think you're going to need a few extra even after Ziva and I move in. While I love to cook, I have some of the same OCD habits as you. We're definitely going to need someone to clean up and take care of the puppies. It's best if she doesn't wear a size 8 shoe.
ReplyDeleteI don't think I have any OCD problems, but I do suffer from extreme impatience.
ReplyDeleteMy question is, are you good with doing windows?
ReplyDeleteNow, Nicky, I think Max and Alex can cover the puppies. But I agree, we do need some worker bees (I mean energetic non-drinker, tiny or huge footed) sister wives who care nothing about shopping or clothes.
ReplyDeleteWith a sister wife, you'd never have to pick up anything that is out of place again!
ReplyDeleteWell, Thoughtsy, I need to choose wisely. I need a sister wife who is as OCD as I am over messes and magazines. She would have to rush to pick up anything out of place or I'd be a bit disappointed.
ReplyDeleteOhh I am so onboard! And thank god you only like white flowers, I'm the same. I'm not all that into cleaning, though, we might need someone to do that for us.. ;)
ReplyDeleteColorful flowers outside are fine, but white ones are better in the house. It's something I realized many years ago and I'm glad you share my view. We need to find at least one "clean freak" as a sister wife. But it doesn't have to be me, you, or Nicky.
ReplyDeleteI'm afraid I would not do as a sister-wife at all. I'd be just sitting there right by your side waiting for Alex to come home with presents for me, as well. I am always happen to pour the wine, though. :)
ReplyDeleteI hate cleaning my own home but I'm hell on wheels in other people's homes. I'm all in on this one. I sure hope Nicky and Ziva are OCD too. I they're not, they will be after a couple of days with us.
ReplyDeletePlease let Alex know that I haven't been into jewelry since the 00s. He'll just have to get a bit more creative with the gifts he brings home for me.
Cheryl, if you are inclined to like "tech toys", Alex is your man. He is all about the tech. He would also buy you Italian leather stuff and he's very good at that. Ferragamo makes wonderful flat shoes you know.
ReplyDeleteThe problem, Jayne, is that you might even be more high maintenance than me and that would never do.
ReplyDeleteAhahahahahaha!
ReplyDeleteI need someone to suss out a lighter weight camera, preferably a Nikon, along with a couple of good lenses including, but not limited to a 55-300 mm and a macro. If he's game, so am I. Hell, if he's feeling all researchy, ask him if he'd be willing to check 'em out now.
ReplyDeleteCheryl, Alex is actually pretty brilliant in some areas, but a total imbecile in others. Unfortunately, cameras and camera equipment are not on his brilliant side. For that matter, neither are picking up after himself, basic math, or a great command of English. (He's great in bed though.)
ReplyDelete:)
ReplyDeleteWhat? I said I'd pour the wine. You mean there's more involved? ;)
ReplyDeleteNot really. We just need to get some little worker sister-wives and it'll be fine.
ReplyDeleteI'm not looking for someone who's good in bed, I need someone who can do some research and tell me what I should buy. Sheesh.
ReplyDeleteCheryl, I only said that because I called him an imbecile. You know, ego. (He reads this sometimes.)
ReplyDeleteI can sew a little bit but I don't think I'm good enough to qualify me to be a sister wife. Practice makes perfect though. Only thing is, I don't think I'd enjoy living with a buncha women. I did in basic training and in Saudi and frankly, it wasn't worth the trouble. You've at least got me to thinking what I could be good at in such a situation.... Not being the domestic or Ms Fix-It type, I don't see I'm a good fit after all.
ReplyDeleteYou're messing with machismo. I'm now more than a just a little impressed with your chutzpah.
ReplyDeleteI have OCD when it comes to finding things, like if I sit there and think "Hey, where's that shirt I bought last week?" I can't stop until I find it. The worse is if I'm at work and think to myself "Where's my camera" or some other item and I can't actually go looking for it yet. It will drive me NUTS.
ReplyDeleteI definitely don't have OCD. Probably the opposite actually. To the point where my mind wanders in odd spots. One could be talking about something else, and -- hey, have you had a good blintz lately? They are pretty good. You should try reading about them. Wait ... what were we talking about?
ReplyDeleteI do that too, B. And it really can drive one nutty.
ReplyDeleteI have not yet checked out your Blintz, but I intend to. I've never had one myself. (Who comes up with these goofy prompts?)
ReplyDeleteI think that reading about interesting things is less OCD and more just a thirst for knowledge? You are obviously a very smart woman!!
ReplyDeleteI just wish my OCD led me to physics or rocket science. Polygamy is fun, but not all that useful as a subject matter. Know what I mean?
ReplyDelete