Wednesday, February 6, 2013

Me and My OCD

I look somewhat normal, but don't be fooled.

I have just decided that I suffer from Obsessive/Compulsive Disorder.  I guess I've had it for a long time, but never really recognized my symptoms.

I cannot buy enough shoes.  I have to pick up anything that is out of place immediately.  I refuse to get out of bed before 9:00 AM.  As if that's not bad enough, I only appreciate white flowers.  I love flowers, but if they are not white, they are somehow "wrong".  And when something is "wrong", it makes me nervous.

I get on kicks where I read about one subject obsessively.  But that's not all.  I'll get so that I have to research anything about that subject that is mentioned in the book.  This would be great if I was reading about something that would further my education in a practical way, but it never is.    I'm so venal that I pursue knowledge about the harems of the Ottoman Empire.  Now how often does that come up in conversation?

Recently, I've been reading about war.  Not just one war, but everything I can find about all wars.  Got a war in China in the 13th century?  Great, let's read about it.  How about the war on drugs?  Fine!  "The Art Of War"?  Superb.  The Civil War?  Oh yeah.  WEB Griffin has written a lot military fiction, maybe 50 books.  I've read them all.

Before that, I was on a Polygamy kick.  I think I read 27 books about polygamy in a row.  Now, I know I have discussed having "Sister Wives" and I still think it's a good idea.  I want young strong sister wives who like to cook, clean house, do laundry, iron, walk dogs, and clean up dog poop.  I know the polygamous community is not usually all that great for some people, but I think it would work fine for me.  I am not a jealous woman, but I am a lazy one.  I am still hoping that Nicky and Ziva decide to join us one day.  But I'm open to adding one or two more sister wives if they bring the right skill set to the table so to speak.  If she could sew or do a little plumbing, it would be awesome.

With sister wives, I would have much more time to read and buy shoes and arrange white flowers.  

Or maybe I should just get a pill for the OCD.  That might be a lot cheaper.